In recent meetings with friends on a trip back to Minnesota, I was repeatedly asked “why Mexico.” Mention was often made that I was leaving comfort and certainty and trading it for anxiety and uncertainty. Many asked “aren’t you afraid.”
Ironically, it was precisely the “uncertainty” that was one of the core reasons for leaving in the first place. I enjoy the unknown. I enjoy not knowing the outcomes. I relish discovery and adventure. For me living with uncertainty means having to operate without fear. Staying in a certain and safe place and not venturing out seems, to me, a manifestation of fear. Of course, I am not naive or stupid (there are, of course, folks out there that will disagree with this sentiment.) When I say living without fear, I really mean trying to live fearlessly. Take chances. Resort to one’s instincts. Learn about things first hand. Moving through life’s journey requires more than checklists. I requires acknowledging shortcomings, embracing them, and doing something about it.
My shortcomings make up a long list–as anyone who knows me will attest. Each day I try to tackle one of them and move on. Moving to Mexico has given me first hand contact with people that are, sadly, demonized by some folks in the US (witness the recent blaming of illegal immigrates for the measles outbreak.) I have learned more about the Mexican and Mayan people in one year that in 65. But, I have much more to learn and embracing uncertainty will hopefully lead me to a deeper understanding of my new country, its people, it language and its customs and beliefs. We shall see. For now I am not afraid and am not at all certain what tomorrow will bring. This uncertainty will certainly lead to more…not less.